[Newspoetry] family update

[auntbarb at onthejob.net]

Family Forcast 12/25/99

Overall forcast: Bargars continue to increase exponentially.  Members of
	the next generation (Paul) spent today sitting in the back
	of the minivan exploring the wonderous taste and mouth feel of
	plastic chew rings.  Other members (Ian) like to help Grandpa
	(Dad) out with measurements on construction projects.  Ian is
	getting ready for the arrival of his new sister ("Oopsina") by
	saying "hello sister" to his mother's (my sister's) stomach.  This
 	trend is expected to continue through tommorrow, and into next
 	year.

Christmas forcast:  Packages will be ripped open within the next
	twenty-four hours. Food is predicted to be consumed in somewhat 
	unpredictable quantity. Several diapers will also be changed within
	 the next twenty-four hours.  Silly behaviour such as the exchange
	of goofy faces between consenting adults, 
	the continuation of arguments that started twenty years ago, and
	squawking in fake British accents at the top of the lungs, shall also 
        take place within the next twenty-four hours, and are expected to
	continue into next week.

Long-range forcast:  All parties shall continue to get older, with serious
	disagreements predicted to be kept at a minimum.  Although grey
	hair is starting to permeate adults ranging in age from
	28 to 40, receeding hairlines are not expected at this 	time.  A
	slight increase in members is expected in February.