[Newspoetry] Genes Accross America

[Sam Markewich 2]

SCIENTISTS UNCOVER MARTINLUTHERVANDROSSSAMMYDAVISKINGJUNIORSHORTXIV GENE
IN STARTLING DISCOVERY!

	Scientists today concluded but re-opened the Human Genome Project with
what they are calling "a startling discovery".  Geneticists on the
project upon its  completion accidentally spilled a glass of DNA and
whiskey durring a toast celebrating the project's long-awaited end. 
Those who worked on the project expected to drink in their victory by
consuming all of the no-longer-neeed DNA. But none of them expected that
when they sprayed the double-helix stain left behind on the floor with
liquid nitrogen soap that this would turn up a hitherto unheard of Gene.
 Dr. Hanz Farthatbroque who headed the Genome project said, "We on the
project are simply stunned to discover that our work has not in fact
concluded at all but only just begun."  
	The doctor was referring to the work that lies ahead in finding a
viable explanation for the newly uncovered
MartinLutherVandrossSammyDavisKingJuniorShortXIV Gene.  This gene,
geneticists say, turns out to leave one big mystery alive for genetic
researchers to solve.  The gene throws a wrench in the theory espoused
by the Genome Project scientists that all humans are fundamentally
identical by opening the question up of exactly how to explain the
unlikely but nonetheless extremely common phenomenon (some scientists
speculate this is actually a series of tightly packed and interwoven
phenomena) of two or more people sharing aspects of their names but
sharing little else in common.  The Gene was named after civil rights
leader Dr. Martin Luther King Junior, soul sensation Luther Vandross,
lounge sensation Sammy Davis Junior, comic sensation Martin Short and
King Louis XIV, former CEO of the France Corporation.  Such "trait
specificity" as that shared in common by these people's names puzzles
scientists, who had previously thought appreciable differences between
people were genetic accidents which occurred only seldom in history.  
	Dr. Farthatbroque reports that he will re-open the Human Genome Project
later this month.  While this new gene is an apparent set back, some on
the project have already begun to speculate that with further research
they will locate the Bozz Skaggs Gene, which they believe governs all
other genes in the human pool.  This gene, they believe, will show
definitively that ultimately humans have nothing in common at all, just
as rocker Bozz Skaggs is the only human ever to have been named Bozz.