[Newspoetry] (no subject)

[Dirk Stratton]

What if a pill could end crime?

WASHINGTON - The genetic revolution made possible by mapping the 
human genome may include new cures for drug addiction, restoring 
health to the mentally ill and, perhaps, one day replacing prisons 
with pills, experts say. . . . "Some physicians already regard 
criminality as a disease," Dr. McGuffin said. Treating crime with 
pills "is a possibility" if researchers can find a genetic basis for 
some of the human impulses that underlie some crimes, he said.
					--Cincinnati Post, Feb. 11, 2001


Off the record,
Dr. McGuffin continued:
"Unfortunately, such pills would
be controlled
substances, otherwise known as drugs, and
thus be illegal without a prescription. Given the strong likelihood
that the effect of these pills might include
a highly euphoric effect, we'd
ironically enough, have created
something new to get addicted
to, resulting in a new breed
of criminal seeking ways to obtain these pills; then we'll be in a very bad
situation because we'll have to decide
whether to cure their criminality with the very pill they became crooked
to obtain or punish them by keeping them in an undrugged,
'criminal-ed'
state by withholding the medicine. In such a case, have we rehabilitated
them or exacerbated
the problem? Or do you treat the addiction to the pills, which caused
the criminal behavior in the first place, with a pill developed
to cure addictions to pills? As you can see, genome research is freighted
with such difficulties. We need
to think more about possible unanticipated
consequences, or at least, someone should
do that--I'm too busy. Aside
from that, a number of people believe we've failed
unless we keep a significant portion of our minority population jailed.
This country has worked
hard
to build
the largest population of incarcerated
people in the world;
it's a matter of pride:
we must keep those cells filled
I'm afraid. . .
Quite the conundrum, eh? What? Yes, my name really is McGuffin and
I've heard every Hitchcock joke every imagined,
so put a cork in it, bud."



****

Joe--
the only constraint: every line ends with a 'd' (or in a couple of 
places a 'd' sound). The occasional rhymes are "accidental" for the 
most part.

--dirk
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