[Newspoetry] Fwd: [Sing] Voting update -- polls close this evening... or maybe tomorrow:

[Robert Porter]

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>Subject: [Sing] Voting update -- polls close this evening... or 
>maybe tomorrow:
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>Date: Fri, 18 Oct 2002 12:17:40 -0500 (CDT)
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>URBANA, IL: Amid widespread speculation of voter fraud, ballot box
>stuffing, and negative campaigning, Mulled Cider has taken a decisive one
>vote lead in the polls.  Surging from a two vote deficit, Mulled Cider is
>now clearly the frontrunner.  "Voter turnout has been light," claimed one
>election official, "its possible that neither candidate is addressing the
>real concerns of constituents."  One black-block ne'er-do-well was
>overheard stating, "For decades, those with more thirst have dominated our
>elections.  It's time for revolution -- it's time to overthrow potable
>politics and build a world where every thirst is quenched."
>
>Cider brewing magnate Stephen MacIntosh claimed that the election was
>clean and fair, "Certainly there are those who don't believe in our
>democratic system; but it has always responded to my desires, and I don't
>see how such a system would be any different for anyone else."  Asked what
>he thought about his brother's recent surge in the polls, Mr. MacIntosh
>stated that it demonstrated "The will of [the] people overcomming the
>cynicism of the majority."
>
>Dr. Cocoa, once the people's favorite, but now languishing, had a
>different take, "The majority of the people are cocoa lovers, when asked
>if they'd rather have a chocolate bar or an apple and the result is clear
>-- the people want chocolate.  My opponent's allies are manipulating the
>polls and misleading the people."  Referring to Mr. Cider's new national
>thirst quenching plan, Dr. Cocoa lambasted his opponent's position,
>"Analysts have known for years that chocolate-flavored cider is not a
>viable solution."
>
>With the race so tight, analysts are predicting "someone will win -- that
>we can be sure of."  With so much riding on this race it's certain to be a
>devisive issue among Sing participants.  Preliminary results will be
>available Saturday with final results quaffed Sunday beginning at 7p.m.
>
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