[Newspoetry] Re: Newspoetry Digest, Vol 4, Issue 4

[Mhubertw at aol.com]

LOW CARB BARB

DID NOT LIKE HOW I LOOKED IN THE NUDE!
BEFORE YOU THINK ME CRUDE
OR EGOCENTRICALLY LEWD,
EVEN MY CATS HISSED AT WHAT THEY VIEWED!
AS MY WAISTLINE BEGAN TO PROTRUDE,
MY OWN MIRROR WANTED ME SUED!
I BEGAN TO BROOD!
NO WAY WOULD I PURSUED!
HOW WOULD I BE WOOED?
EVEN MY SHADOW BOOED!
THEN THINKING MYSELF SO SHREWD.
SPECIAL DIET PILLS I CHEWED.
EXOTIC TEAS I BREWED.
NO EXERCISE ROUTINES DID I ELUDE.
EVERY MORSEL I REVIEWED.
EVEN WITH LOW FAT MUSIC DID I SECLUDE!
MY CLOTHES NO LONGER OBTRUDE.
REINFORCED TOLIET SEATS ARE NOW ESCHEWED!
ALWAYS IN A MOST AMOROUS MOOD,
NOW ONLY MYSELF I LOVE I CONCLUDE!

COPYRIGHT  2004  HUBERT WILSON

FOR DIETING AMERICANS RELISHING NARCISSISM (DARN)
AND BARBARA BUSH, THE YOUNGER, 
AND BARBARA BUSH, THE OLDER,
AND
WHOOPI GOLDBERG
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