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Three guys are convicted of a very serious crime, and they're all sentenced
to twenty years in solitary confinement. They're each allowed one thing to
bring into the cell with them. The first guy asks for a big stack of books.
The second guy asks for his wife. And the third guy asks for two hundred
cartons of cigarettes. At the end of the twenty years, they open up the
first guy's cell . He comes out and says, "I studied so hard. I'm so bright
now, I could be a lawyer. It was terrific." They open up the second guy's
door. He comes out with his wife , and they've got five new kids. He says.
"It was the greatest thing of my life. My wife and I have never been so
close. I have a beautiful new family. I love i t." They open up the third
guy's door, and he's slapping at his pockets, going "Anybody got a match?"
There was a farmer who raised watermelons. He was doing pretty well but he
was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch
at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought he comes up
with a clever idea that he thinks will scare the kids away for sure. So he
makes up a sign and posts it in the field. The next day the kids show up and
they see this sign, which says, "Warning, one of the watermelons in this
field has been injected with cyanide." So the kids run off and make up their
own sign, which they post next to the sign that the farmer made. The farmer
shows up the next day to look over his field. He notices that no watermelons
are missing but he notices a new sign next to his. He drives over to the
sign and takes a look. It says, "Now there are two"
famiri-0jissitsu62classmat,jinjiins akihiko.