[Peace-discuss] resistance in the military

[C. G. Estabrook]

	Monday January 17, 5:51 PM
	Images Behind Soldier's Iraq Refusal

A young girl clutching her arm blackened by burns, dogs feeding off bodies
in mass graves _ the images still haunt Sgt. Kevin Benderman 15 months
after he came home from Iraq.

Witnessing the brutal reality of war, Benderman stunned his commanders
when he sought a discharge as a conscientious objector after 10 years in
the Army.

In an interview with The Associated Press, the sergeant said he never
grasped the misery that war inflicts on civilians as well as combatants
until he saw it all firsthand.

"Some people may be born a conscientious objector, but sometimes people
realize through certain events in their lives that the path they're on is
the wrong one," Benderman said. "The idea was: Do I really want to stay in
an organization where the sole purpose is to kill?"

Benderman's decision _ choosing conscience over his commitment to fellow
troops _ has meant bearing the insults.

An officer called him a coward. His battalion chaplain shamed him in an
e-mail from Kuwait. That's because Benderman, whose unit just deployed for
a second combat tour in Iraq, refused to return to war.

Benderman, 40, filed notice in December, and his timing could hardly have
been worse for the Army. The Fort Stewart-based 3rd Infantry Division
began deploying its 19,000 soldiers this month.

Benderman's unit, the 3rd Forward Support Battalion, was leaving for
Kuwait on Jan. 5. When commanders ordered him to deploy while they
processed his objector application, he refused to show up for his flight.

He said he has his reasons, reflecting on time in Iraq.

Benderman told of bombed out homes and displaced Iraqis living in mud huts
and drinking from mud puddles; mass graves in Khanaqin near the Iranian
border where dogs fed off bodies of men, women and children.

He recalled his convoy passing a girl, no older than 10, on the roadside
clutching a badly injured arm. Benderman said his executive officer
refused to help because troops had limited medical supplies.

"Her arm was burned, third-degree burns, just black. And she was standing
there with her mother begging for help," Benderman said. "That was an eye
opener to seeing how insane it really is."

Now Benderman, a mechanic who has been reassigned to a non-deploying rear
detachment unit, could face a court-martial. Fort Stewart officials have
not decided whether to charge him.

Separately, he must convince commanders he is morally opposed to war in
all forms, as Army regulations define conscientious objection, despite his
lengthy military service and previous combat tour.

"If he went to Iraq and then comes back and says, `I'm now opposed to
war,' the issue is are you opposed to all wars or just this one you don't
want to go back to?" said Mark Stevens, a military defense lawyer and
retired Marine Corps judge advocate. "He wasn't opposed to war two years
ago, why is he opposed to it now?"

Benderman said the officer who took his objector notice dismissed him as a
coward. His unit's chaplain offered little encouragement.

"You should have had the moral fortitude to deploy with us and see me here
in Kuwait to begin your CO application," Army Chaplain Matt Temple said in
a recent e-mail to Benderman. "You should be ashamed of the way you have
conducted yourself. I certainly am ashamed of you."

Benderman's wife, Monica, said her husband hinted that he had doubts about
taking part in the war in a letter he sent home that referenced scholars'
belief that Iraq was home to the biblical Garden of Eden.

"He said, `Here I am in the Garden of Eden, and what am I doing here with
a gun?'" she said.

Raised a Southern Baptist in Tennessee, Benderman keeps an open Bible on
his living room table but said he's "more spiritual than religious." After
going to Iraq, he picked up the Quran and was struck by the similarities
between Islam and Christianity.

He returned in September 2003 after serving eight months in Iraq with the
4th Infantry Division from Fort Hood, Texas. As a mechanic who fixes
Bradley armored vehicles, he said he never fired a weapon in combat.

Still, Benderman began questioning whether he could return to a war zone
when he transferred to Fort Stewart in October 2003. He said he never
mentioned his doubts to soldiers in his new unit, but trained with them
for a year as they prepared for a second tour. By December, he had even
packed his clothes and equipment for shipping overseas.

Benderman acknowledged that waiting more than a year, until right before
deployment, may seem "out of the blue." But he insisted his decision came
from long deliberation, not desperation.

"People say, `You're abandoning these soldiers that depend on you,' and so
that weighs on you," he said. "But what's worse? Going over there and
participating in war, or maybe doing something that can help people figure
out that you don't have to go to war?"
	  	
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