[Peace-discuss] From The Babylon Bee

C. G. Estabrook carl at newsfromneptune.com
Wed Dec 18 18:55:19 UTC 2019


What is impeachment?

It's the official, constitutional method for screaming at the sky because Trump is president.

Why is Trump being impeached?

Trump has committed some very serious offenses, from not being a Democrat to being a Republican. He also won the 2016 election, which rises to the level of high crimes and misdemeanors. He also restored the celebration of Christmas after eight years of winter with no Christmas under Obama. This drove Dems up a wall so they drummed up some charges against him.

Why didn't Democrats include any criminal offenses in the articles of impeachment?

There were just so many of them, it was hard to pick one. So, instead of laying out actually impeachable offenses, the Democrats summarized it all with two main articles of impeachment: 1.) Trump is president. 2.) TRUMP IS PRESIDENT.

What does it take to remove the president from office?

Faith, trust, and pixie dust.

Will Trump be removed from office?

Lol.

If we believe in ourselves and try hard, and Trump is removed, Hillary Clinton becomes president, right?

Actually, Mike Pence would become president, basically making the United States into a Handmaid's Tale-style dystopia.

What happens if Trump is impeached in the House but acquitted in the Senate?

Democrats don't get the big prize, but they each get a complimentary copy of Impeachment: The Board Game.

Once the House votes to officially impeach President Trump, what happens next?

Trump wins the 2020 election.

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