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[darron mhoon]

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Bertha was a very pretty girl. Quite a lot of young men wanted to marry
her, but she was not satisfied with any of  them. One day, one of the young
men came to visit her and asked her to become his wife. She answered, "No,
John,I won't marry you.I want to marry a man who is famous, who can play
music m sing and dance very well, who can tell interesting stories, who does
not smoke or drink , who stays at home in the evenings and who stops talking
when I'm tired of listening."The young man got up, took his coat and went to
the door, but before he left the house, he turned and said to Bertha, "It
isn't a man you're looking for. It's a television set."
A woman went into a funeral home to make arrangements for her husband's
funeral. She told the director that she wanted her husband to be buried in a
dark blue suit. He asked, "Wouldn't it just be easier to bury him in the
black suit that he's wearing?""No," she insisted as she handed him a check
to buy a dark blue suit. "It must be blue."When she came back for the wake,
she saw her husband in the coffin, and he was wearing a beautiful blue suit.
She told the director how much she loved the suit and asked how much it
cost. He said, "Actually, it didn't cost anything. The funniest thing
happened. As soon as you left, another corpse was brought in wearing a blue
suit. I noticed that they were about the same size, and asked the other
widow if she would mind if her husband were buried in a black suit. She said
that was fine with her, so I switched the heads."
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