[Newspoetry] Missing Hat!

[William Gillespie]

The purpose of this message is to address complaints I have received about
this list being used for Urbana-only announcements regarding neither news
nor poetry. It is unlikely, for example, that correspondents living in
Chicago, Cincinnati, Boston, San Diego, or England have Bill's hat. Hell, I
live in Urbana, and I don't even have Bill's hat. "What hat," they are
wondering, "and who's Bill?" Such people would doubtlessly approach such an
email message the way one might approach a meeting of the WEFT Associates,
or the Bulletin Board at the Food Co-op, if you know what I mean. Let's try
to keep the cardinals off the purple coneflowers, if possible. I mean, how
would you feel if you were smoking hand-rolled cigarettes made with Cherry
tobacco from Jon's Pipe Shop, reading the Octopus with Dave King in the
bowling alley at the Illini Union, and Chief Illiniwek walked up to you and
said "While I agree with the aims of the PRC, I think it is rife with
internal political maneuvering and suffers from the machismo of some of the
older activists." Pretty weird, I bet, and that's exactly my point. But
this isn't just about the missing hat of a guy who is so relentlessly
extroverted that he's been in 46 Newspoets' houses all over the world in
the past week alone. (That's the power of Birkenstocks!) Try to look at it
their way: I mean, there they are trying to cross Vine street on Elm to get
to the Elite Diner, but they can't get any farther than the brick median
strip because the students are back in town. It's like arriving at the
Courier Cafe' when they're out of croissants and the salad bar has already
been taken down. They probably feel like taking a walk down by the
abandoned water tower near the train station, or just enjoying a Bob at the
Paradiso, but they can't, because they have to cook a vegan dinner of
organic eggplant from the Blue Moon farm for the School for Designing
Society. See what I mean? Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to start a
controversy about Democracy Now or write an angry riposte to Carl
Estabrook's latest "News from Neptune," believe me, I'm just trying to find
a parking space so I can return some Lyn Hejinian books to the stacks and
maybe take in some Thai food at the Y Eatery. Please don't think that I'm
State Representative Johnson voting against an amendment to protect people
from discrimination based on sexual orientation. So, when posting to the
Newspoetry list, please try to be respectful of those who are least likely
to have your hat.

Our Founder

Bill Wendling wrote:

> You've seen it.
> You've loved it.
> You've laughed at it behind my back.
>
> My hat is gone.
> I know not where.
> If you have an idea, I'm all ears.
>
> Many questions may be asked,
> but the reunion is the most important part.
>
> Thanks to one and all!
>
> --
> || Bill Wendling                        wendling at ganymede.isdn.uiuc.edu
>
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