[Newspoetry] Re: Democratic Liberals Strike Again - Newspoem

[gillespie william k]

Newspoem

"Onion Article" links to
http://www.theonion.com/onion3726/bush_finds_error.html
"Chomsky" links to
http://jac.gsu.edu/jac/11.1/Articles/1.htm

.....

Onion Article Not Funny

.

In sort of an odd way,
this story in the Onion
isn't funny.

Because I wish it were true.

This gag takes as its premise
(already firmly established)
that our president is all
but functionally illiterate.

We've moved beyond jokes about
the president misusing words
to the point where the idea
that the president is
sophisticated, talented, punctilious, and gracious
(in every respect a wonderful man)
is subversively side-splitting.

But what if it were true?

It could denote utopia
if the president were,
simply, the best of men:
a self-proclaimed "dilettante"
whose rigorous excellence
in all pursuits was tempered
only by his gentle humility.

On the other hand, if Bush
were that smart, we'd all be in
serious trouble, since intelligence
does not entail kindness,
sympathy, or humility.

Chomsky is in favor of corruption:
As long as the ruling elite
is interested more interested
in money than in power,
the damage they do is limited.

But if America ever had
a truly charismatic president,
a leader, an impressive person,
capable of inspiring loyalty,
conditions would be right for
fascism.

Write a funny poem about the human race hitting bottom.

Who is this Bush?
What is his name?
What does he mean?

Nothing. He does not exist.
He'd rather be drunk on a boat
somewhere, losing at checkers.

He is only the president.
A blank, an empty signifier,
a face on a dollar bill.

...

On Fri, 3 Aug 2001, hutch  wrote:

> Right on, Carl! And do you think Gore would have been smart enough to do what The Onion recently reported Dubya doing? Check it out:
>
> http://www.theonion.com/onion3726/bush_finds_error.html
>
> ---jh
>
> ---------- Original Message ----------------------------------
> From: "C. G. Estabrook" <galliher at alexia.lis.uiuc.edu>
> Date:  Fri, 3 Aug 2001 20:27:38 -0500
>
> >
> >This from Jerry Landay's column in this week's Octopus:
> >
> >"Tim [Johnson]'s letter invites us to `call me' at his district offices if
> >we have any questions. I propose that we write or phone him at 2004 Fox
> >Drive in Champaign, 217-403-4690, and deliver this message: we'll send
> >half the rebate to the re-election campaign of Senator Dick Durbin, and
> >the other half to Cong. Dave Phelps, or whoever is going to oppose Johnson
> >next year."
> >
> >Phelps was one of the handful of democrats who voted FOR drilling in ANWR
> >yesterday.  Durbin, after initially expressing dismay, learnt his lines
> >and is now supporting the criminal war in Colombia.  Johnson on the other
> >hand was one of the few Republicans who (properly) voted against the
> >lyingly-titled and business-friendly Republican "Patient Protection Act."
> >
> >--CGE
> >
> >
> >
>