[Newspoetry] brief(case) speculation

[ahcopter at midway.uchicago.edu]

brief(case) speculation

the most powerful man alive, as is historically his lot, carries a symbol of his 
power everywhere he goes in public.  it's not a scepter, a crown, the keys to 
air force one, or even an electric guitar: it's a briefcase.

i recently began to wonder what the man who can mould our play-dough economy to 
do his bidding may carry in there.  maybe it's the fun factory extrusion toy, 
because purple spaghetti is so much fun, or a cookie cutter, because green 
dollar signs are more up his alley.

i have a few better ideas.  my dad told me today that there's really nothing in 
there--he just carries it around to look cool.  maybe he's succeeded--he's cool 
enough so that my dear friend across the hallway, a computer science/economics 
double major, let his big scary headshot adorn his computer desktop for an 
entire quarter.  joe futrelle gave me another avenue of speculation--maybe it's 
all symbolic, and following the briefcase (and the rate-fiddling) of the most 
powerful man alive can expose a microcosm--or at least an interesting seasonal 
tracking device--for a long-term relationship.

(along this line, how does a thin but still substantial briefcase, paired with a 
half-point rate cut, bode for an overly contemplative, anti-capitalist, 
eighteen-year-old newspoet's chances for love or anything else, just wondering? 
 it's a lot more amusing, enlightening, and edifying than just reading the 
horoscope.)

back to the point...what is in that briefcase of his?  there's a vote for 
nothing, a vote for anything, and a vote for play-dough moulding implements.  
we'll probably never know the answer if the mass media has anything to do with 
it, because they only show him walking, briefcase in tow, along the same sunny 
concrete corridor every time.  i suppose i could write him a letter and just 
ask, but i'm sure the most powerful man alive has secretaries, privacy rules, 
and separate guards at each location to open the briefcase at every function.  
why should the most powerful man alive waste brain space with such trivial 
things as the combination to the lock on his briefcase, especially when this 
could only result in the possibility that its owner may open the briefcase 
somewhere other than a locked, smoky room surrounded by his most loyal cronies 
from banking and other big business?

maybe it's more fun to speculate than to actually know what's in there--the most 
powerful man alive is still a man alive, and an old one at that, so he could 
only be hiding a bottle of arthritis pills and a packet of kleenex.


                                      --nicky neulist