[Newspoetry] Pretentious Interruptus

[Jay Morris]

Pretentious Interruptus

MCI-WorldCom's cheif excecutive, Bernard J. Ebbers, held a press
conference this afternoon, in the hope of reversing his company's
falling stock trend.  Ebbers announced WorldCom will be adding new
features which should boost the company's slumping figures.

He was somewhat confused when a reporter asked "Sir, do you currently
pay more than $33 for your local phone service?".  "Uhh, I'm not
interested in discussing my phone bill right now", Ebbers replied.

When the same reporter asked "Are you interested in saving up to 50%
on your local AND long distance calls?", Ebbers looked upset, "Look, I
don't have time for this".

The reporter pressed further "But sir, did you know that our
World-Saver program offers 5 cents a minute to countries such as
England, France, Italy and Japan? There are no extra numbers to dial,
and you'll be charged on your regular phone bill.  So let's get you
signed up today".

Ebbers turned off his microphone and stormed out of the room.