[Newspoetry] this isn't breaking poetry

[Donald L Emerick]

Kaballah Today reports:
HeartBreaking News differs from HardBallBreaking News,
and may be either HardAss News or FastBreaking News,
but I defer, on quiet poetry of all deficiency, every poverty,
where a fat R moves around a cross that stands like a T,
while someone signs V for escaping victory over my fate.

Cut Bridge to Vicious Town Across WrongSide High Sp.Ed. Tracks:

Phil Spears, Mayor of the Greater California Co-Prosperity Sphere (GCPS),
(aka, director, CA Dept of Ed -- Standards & Assessments Division [CadEdSad])
announced today that new entrance requirements to High School were being
established, in light of the exit conditions that seem to enhance the ability of
some students at going to work immediately after High School.  Said Spears,

"I have long noticed that many of our High School students fail to go on
to work, immediately after High School.  They are not employable then,
and we have to continue educating them in Special Institutions that we
euphemistically call institutions of higher education, which are also known
as colleges and universities.  We try to rub out their precocious ideas, over
the course of four or so years, so they stop trying to think for themselves.

Sometimes, one gets through anyway, despite our best efforts to rub out
their brilliancy, to discredit their creativity, to turn them into proper canon
fodder, who know that it is quite pointless to think or to work for yourself.
Many of these rehabilitated students are then able, with a great deal of
medical assistance over the course of the rest of their lives, to live almost
normally, untroubled by residual awareness that the universe need not be
as fucked up as it appears to be.  (See Moore, Stupid White Guys...2001.).

However, my GCPS group has recently determined that we could save the
hard-working tax-payers of the GCPS literally billions of dollars if we could
show these troubled students how to overcome their thinking disabilities at
relatively earlier ages, so that they stop wasting years in these expensive
special ed programs, learning nothing that was not already known,
and expecting, for some odd reason, to be treated at least as well as, and
often -- far too often -- better than everyone else.  We need to teach them
a lesson they won't soon forget, if they ever make the mistake of forgetting.

So, I have drafted and assigned a team of pharmacological specialists and
brain surgeons to come up with a scheme for eliminating the excess brain
capacities of these disabled persons, restoring them to normalcy, for far
longer and more productive years, than the old cognitivist therapy regimes
of the free public schooling idealists could ever achieve.  (And, if this new
medical program costs the public purse too much, well, I have a standing
offer from Local #4617 of the Black Shirt Goons, that a few cracks on the
skull nicely complement cranial plate stress separations when well-placed.)

And, by the way, we are not unaware that millions of students have been
using expensive devices to enhance and falsify their test scores.  So, I
wanted to announce today that, during all future high school exams, we
will no longer tolerate the wearing of glasses and other visual aids for
the visually impaired.  After all, if a student can't see the work that is right
in front of him, on his desk, why would we let him have a pair of glasses
to see the work that is on someone else's desk?  A student should be
able to do his own work, without depending on watching what others do.

Moreover, the whole idea of glasses supports a communist theory of
cheating, of peering at the answers that peers give to exam questions --
but, mere imitation never works in work places.  At some time or another,
every student needs to know that answers are not available from his or
her peers.  That student needs to prepared for real life, where everyone
knows that the boss is the only one who understands the question
and thus is the only one who has an answer that has any meaning!

Eliminating visual aids for the visually impaired will also save taxpayers
of the GCPS billions of dollars, as parents realize that glasses, for
instance, to name the most common visual aid, are no longer required.
Visual aids will no longer be equipment hurdles to leap before graduation.

In other studies, we have determined that reading, 'riting and 'rithmetic
have become overly complicated curricula, stressing things that have
nothing to do with how work is actually done in the workplace.  We
have determined that everyone should learn how to make charts and
how to change fonts and graphics and AV clips -- and that that is all
that any person ever needs, to succeed at work, in business, today.

Well, actually, they need one more skill, but it is broadly genetic,
and congenital -- so it probably does not belong in school curricula,
anyway.  Namely, one needs to lie convincingly, unblinkingly, like
GW Bush, Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld.  No one believes
you if you start to sweat when answering a question, or when you
appear nervous, about how others might be reacting to what you say,
as if their opinion could possibly ever matter, at all.  People will invest
in products, no matter how bad they are, only when they believe in
the character of the person, and that is a consummate skill at lying.
But, as I have said, great liars are probably born, not made -- so,
there's nothing we could do for them in Our Town's Special Ed Ops."

Thanks for listening,
Donald L Emerick
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