[Newspoetry] News Flash

[Newton Bigelow]

Good afternoon,

After to a series of misadventures too ludicrous to describe, I've found 
my way back to the gentle confines of Madrid. I can barely believe it 
myself, and can't fit the experience into my mind long enough to describe 
it accurately. For legal reasons, I can't say too much about how I was 
able to leave Baghdad. Let me just note that posing as bodyguard for the 
Iraqi delegation to OPEC is both intensely frightening and mind-scaldingly 
dull.  I'll leave it at that for now, except to say that I have never, 
ever been so glad to get back home.

My apartment was crawling with mice and unread mail. Amongst the bills and 
angry letters, I found a parcel from America containing something called 
Flash.  Although I dislike computer effluvia, after my long months in 
Baghdad it seemed an innocuous way to ease myself back into the 
technological world.

I slipped the CD into my newly acquired laptop (filched from Ahmed Chalabi 
... tell no one), and hit a few random keys. It didn't appear too 
byzantine. Now all I needed was subject matter. Picking up an American 
newspaper, I read with bewilderment the story of the "do-not-call list". 
After being trapped in a place where they consider it a minor miracle if 
the phones ring at all, I had to shake my head at the idea of a populace 
that gets so many calls that the government has to intervene to put a stop 
to it.

Still, I understand the ire of my fellow Americans.  I've spent half my 
life trying to find a place where the hucksters and charlatans will just 
leave me alone. There seems to be no such place. So, in solidarity with 
the 50 million people (more than voted for the current president) who don'
t want to be harassed by unsolicited sales pitches, I've expulsed this 
primitive little animation:

http://www.newtonbigelow.com/WebArt.html

Hope you all enjoy it.

Best regards,

Newton