[Peace-discuss] Weapons of math instrution

[Bob Illyes]

I received the following from Bob Wahlfeldt last night, and though that 
more than a few of the folks on this list would get a laugh out of it:


Teacher arrested

July 31, 2007
New York, NY

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International 
Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a 
protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he 
believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not 
identify the man who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of 
math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by 
means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of 
absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to 
themselves as  'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common 
denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As 
the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are three sides to 
every triangle'."

When asked to comment on the arrest, the President said, "If God had wanted 
us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more 
fingers and toes."

White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent 
or profound statement by the president.