[Peace-discuss] Americans are Prepared for Deceptive Rhetoric

[LAURIE SOLOMON]

>"I thought I wanted a new era of transparency and accountability, but
honestly, I just can't handle it," Ohio resident Nathan >Pletcher said. "All
I ever hear about now is how my retirement has been pushed back 15 years and
how I won't be able to afford >my daughter's tuition when she grows up."

>"From now on, just tell me the bullshit I want to hear," Pletcher added.
"Tell me my savings are okay, everybody has a job, and >we're No. 1 again.
Please, just lie to my face."

 

Unfortunately, most Americans can't handle transparency and accountability
but like to think and pretend that they can handle it and actually desire
it.  They want to be lied to and always have. Any claims to the contrary is
pretense and always has been.  Thus, being prepared to accept deception and
deceptive rhetoric is nothing new.



 

From: peace-discuss-bounces at lists.chambana.net
[mailto:peace-discuss-bounces at lists.chambana.net] On Behalf Of E. Wayne
Johnson
Sent: Monday, May 04, 2009 8:53 PM
To: Peace-discuss
Subject: [Peace-discuss] Americans are Prepared for Deceptive Rhetoric

 

WASHINGTON-After nearly four months of frank, honest, and open dialogue
about the failing economy, a weary U.S. populace announced this week that it
is once again ready to be lied to about the current state of the financial
system.

Tired of hearing the grim truth about their economic future, Americans
demanded that the bald-faced lies resume immediately, particularly whenever
politicians feel the need to divulge another terrifying problem with Wall
Street, the housing market, or any one of a hundred other ticking time bombs
everyone was better off not knowing about.

In addition, citizens are requesting that the phrase, "It will only get
worse before it gets better," be permanently replaced with, "Things are
going great. Enjoy yourselves."

"I thought I wanted a new era of transparency and accountability, but
honestly, I just can't handle it," Ohio resident Nathan Pletcher said. "All
I ever hear about now is how my retirement has been pushed back 15 years and
how I won't be able to afford my daughter's tuition when she grows up."

"From now on, just tell me the bullshit I want to hear," Pletcher added.
"Tell me my savings are okay, everybody has a job, and we're No. 1 again.
Please, just lie to my face."

The national call for decreased candor began last month, after the
Department of Labor released another soul-crushing report that most
Americans agreed "wasn't helping anything" and "didn't need to be so
specific, at least."

The report estimated that 663,000 private and public sector jobs were lost
in the month of March-a revealing statistic many people found shockingly
blunt. Responding to the new information, an overwhelming majority of
citizens said they believe that, during these extremely uncertain times, our
leaders have a responsibility to come together, sit the American people
down, and lie through their teeth about everything from misappropriations of
taxpayer dollars to the severity of the credit crisis.

"I don't need to be constantly reminded that the lack of regulations on Wall
Street compounded with failing institutions like AIG basically plunged the
world economy into a global recession," said 32-year-old office manager
Alexis Harrington. "What I want is for someone to tell me with a straight
face that the GDP is through the roof so that I can feel better and
instantly forget what all these terms even mean."

"For the first time in my life I know who the secretary of the treasury is,"
Harrington continued. "And I don't like it."

Reluctantly informed citizens like Harrington have also asked that CEOs of
the nation's five largest banks release a joint statement saying that the
October bailout worked perfectly, normal lending has resumed, and that we're
nowhere close to having the entire monetary system collapse upon itself like
a house of cards.

According to a CBS News/New York Times poll, 98 percent of Americans no
longer appreciate President Barack Obama's attempts to break down the
economic crisis into simple terms they can understand. Instead, many say the
president should have the decency to insult their intelligence by using
complex jargon to confuse and deceive them, perhaps even implying that the
subprime mortgage fallout was just a big misunderstanding that resulted from
a clerical error.

"I know when he's telling the truth, and it bothers me," recently laid-off
schoolteacher Mary Hanover said of Obama. "He gets this serious expression
on his face and says things like, 'This is the worst economic crisis since
the Great Depression.' Who needs to hear that? For Christ's sake, smile a
bit and say we just found a diamond mine under Montana that's going to pay
for everything. I'll believe you."

"Please, treat me like a child. Treat me like a five-year-old," Sacramento
resident David Cooke, 64, wrote in a letter to Congress. "I lost everything
when the Dow tanked, and I'm too old to start working again, so why punish
me further by explaining in detail the clever ways these investment firms
ripped me off and how they're all going to get away with it?"

Thus far, many policymakers in Washington have responded favorably to their
constituents' requests, saying they respect and understand the public's need
for dishonesty.

"I think we can accommodate the American people on this," Senate majority
leader Harry Reid (D-NV) told reporters. "Why, just today we made excellent
progress with GM, whose CEO Fritz Henderson told us that every penny of
federal and taxpayer funds would go directly to the construction of three
new auto plants in Detroit that will create over 90,000 new jobs and spark
the economic rebound we've been waiting for."

Continued Reid, "Things are looking very, very bright." 

(Yes, this was from the ONION).

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