[Newspoetry] Waiting...*sigh*

[Bill Wendling]

Waiting...

...

.

.


.

It's one of the outer rings of hell. Perhaps it's my masocistic
tendencies which cause me to worry about how people feel about me.

But I hate pain, so that's not it, is it?

Anyway, I should allow myself to feel good about myself. Then this
anxiety would go away. All the self-help books say so. You have to start
out by loving yourself. Yet, I know that if I met myself on the street, I
would find myself annoying. So much so that I'd cross the street and
appear to be looking in a store window just to avoid me.

Of course, me, being just like me, would do the same and we'd invariably
be looking into the same store shop window hoping that the other would go
away first, so as not to seem rude. Never making eye contact, or we'd
have to acknowledge the other's existance.

The Lee Press-on Smiles (tm). The awkwardness. (Doesn't he realize that I
want to be left alone?! The nerve!)

But then, this isn't about me, it's about waiting. While writing this
thing, I find that the waiting is nearly tolerable. Perhaps I'll get an
e-mail, a short message left on my answering machine, a messenger pigeon,
anything to acknowledge my existance and make me whole.

-- 
|| Bill Wendling			wendling at ganymede.isdn.uiuc.edu