[Peace-discuss] Language

Neil Parthun lennybrucefan at gmail.com
Fri Jul 27 16:20:03 CDT 2007


Instead of getting into the 2+ year ago Obama discussion, I'll forego  
that and say I think Mort's flyer was pretty good.

He's created headings and subheadings which organize the piece for  
the reader.

He's connected the messages well so it flows without any big  
deviations or leaps that the reader would have to make.

But, I do have a few suggestions:

Perhaps, as was stated earlier, we may want to vary the word choice  
and use a language that most everybody can understand pretty easily--  
not for the sake of talking down to people but making it accessible  
to a wider range of potential supporters and activists .  I  
understand that the politics of the situation are indeed complex but  
the flyer could benefit from usage of synonyms for certain terms that  
are more well known and understood to the general public.

I think we should probably put more information in there about what  
these people can do tangibly (i.e. attend a meeting) -- assuming they  
read the flyer and agree with the facts/sentiment.  If we're going to  
give them this flyer as a means of informing them and getting them  
active, perhaps we should have more than an ending sentence about  
AWARE and its meeting time/date.  We should be clear with the reader  
about the action we would like them to take upon reading the  
literature.  It would be a positive stepping stone to have a clear  
step for the person to take such as "attend a meeting".  From there,  
AWARE should be ready to give this newcomer a certain definable,  
tangible task that they can do upon their arrival there.  If we can  
scaffold (using a teaching term) effectively and help build new  
activists/new supporters confidence within the movement by making  
them feel valuable, they can become very valuable parts to the anti- 
war movement when they branch out to try new events and activities on  
their own in the future.

Overall, it was a great effort and interesting for me to read but I  
think if we tweak it a little bit, it could be even better.

Don't mourn. Organize,
                     x Neil x

You can't really be strong until you see a funny side to things.
[ken kesey, 1935-2001]

Keep your blood clean, your body lean and your mind sharp.
[henry rollins, 1961-]

I read somewhere that when a person takes part in community action,  
his health improves.  Something happens to him or to her  
biologically. It's like a tonic.
[studs terkel, 1912-]

Even though you can't expect to defeat the absurdity of the world,  
you must make that attempt.  That's morality, that's religion.   
That's art.  That's life.
[phil ochs, 1940-1976]
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