[Peace-discuss] Language

[Neil Parthun]

Carl & AWARE --

Carl had suggested that some examples of substitute text be  
suggested.  So, here are a few ideas that I am offering up to the list:

 From Section [1]: "He has been sympathetic on many domestic social  
issues, but he is not one on crucial issues."  (It removes "to be out  
front").

"His tearful retraction..."  Change some time ago to summer of 2005  
(to give a timeline to the reader).

"He has tended..." remove the term "blithely" or replace with a synonym.

"He in effect..." remove "in effect"

Change "nonchalance" to dispassion

 From Section [2]: change "assuage" to satisfy

 From Section [3]: change "egregiously" to "flagrantly or "outrageously"

Change "pernicious" to destructive

 From Section [5]: Add in something at the end about how people can  
locally fight for their beliefs and speak out (i.e. suggesting they  
come to an AWARE meeting and get involved with a working group,  
etc.)  Which goes straight in to the "Flyer prepared by..."

Anyway, just a few suggestions I wanted to throw out because I didn't  
just want to critique without trying to be proactive about the  
situation.  If AWARE wants to run with them, cool.  If not, then that  
is cool as well to me as well.  Rock.

Don't mourn. Organize,
                     x Neil x

You can't really be strong until you see a funny side to things.
[ken kesey, 1935-2001]

Keep your blood clean, your body lean and your mind sharp.
[henry rollins, 1961-]

I read somewhere that when a person takes part in community action,  
his health improves.  Something happens to him or to her  
biologically. It's like a tonic.
[studs terkel, 1912-]

Even though you can't expect to defeat the absurdity of the world,  
you must make that attempt.  That's morality, that's religion.   
That's art.  That's life.
[phil ochs, 1940-1976]
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