[Peace-discuss] John Cleese And The Terror Threat Level Of Nations

[Robert Naiman]

betcha dollar john cleese never said this

On Sat, Apr 2, 2011 at 3:03 PM, Jenifer Cartwright <jencart13 at yahoo.com>wrote:

>
>
> -------- Original Message --------
>
>   *Chip Shots*
>   *John Cleese And The Terror Threat Level Of Nations*
>
> **The British response to terrorist threats.* Many thanks to my favorite
> funny Englishman, John Cleese, for the following:
>
> The English are concerned about the recent increase in terrorist
> activities, and have therefore raised their security level from "miffed" to
> "peeved." If the threats continue to grow, the security levels may be raised
> to "irritated" or even "a bit cross." (The English have not seen "a bit
> cross" since the blitz in 1940, when tea supplies nearly ran out.)
>
> Terrorists have been recategorized from "tiresome" to "a bloody nuisance."
> The last time Britain issued "a bloody nuisance" warning was in 1588, when
> Spain launched the Spanish Armada.
>
> The Scots have raised their threat level from "pis*ed off" to "let's go get
> the bas*ards." They don't have any other levels—which is why they have been
> placed on the front lines of the British Army for the last 300 years.
>
> The French government announced that it has raised its terror alert from
> "run" to "hide." The only two higher levels in France are "collaborate" and
> "surrender."
>
> Meanwhile, the Spanish are excited to see that their new submarines are
> ready to deploy. These beautiful new vessels have glass bottoms, so the
> Spanish sailors can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
>
> Down under, Australia has raised its security level from "no worries, mate"
> to "she'll be all right." The next escalation would be "we may need to
> cancel the barbie this weekend." The final level is "Crikey! The barbie is
> cancelled." Australia has never faced a crisis so severe that it merited
> this highest level.
>
>  Thank you to John Cleese, British writer, actor and very tall person with
> a funny walk, for today's laugh.
>
> *--Chip Wood*
>
>
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>


-- 
Robert Naiman
Policy Director
Just Foreign Policy
www.justforeignpolicy.org
naiman at justforeignpolicy.org
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